There’s a Sigh in My Soul

There’s a sigh in my soul lately.

Not the kind that comes from being physically tired — but the deep kind. The kind that comes when your heart is trying to hold two truths at the same time.

Like…
I can truly love and respect someone, and still not agree with everything they say or do.
I can give my all at work, pour my heart into it, and still know that my worth isn’t tied up in what I produce.
I can believe God is good — and still feel the sting of unanswered prayers.
Hurt and hope, both sitting at the same table.

And honestly? That tension is uncomfortable. But it’s real life. It’s the in-between, the middle ground where faith has to stretch and grow.

When I read Isaiah 29 and 30, I felt that same tension in the pages. God’s people were going through it. They were saying the right things — honoring God with their lips — but their hearts were far off (Isaiah 29:13). They wanted His help, but they were running to Egypt instead of to Him (Isaiah 30:1-2). Sound familiar?

They were wrestling. Just like we do. They wanted control and comfort. Independence and divine rescue. And God, in His mercy, didn’t give up on them.

Instead, He says something in Isaiah 30:15 that stops me in my tracks:

“In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and trust shall be your strength.”
(Isaiah 30:15)

But they wouldn’t listen.
And sometimes, neither do I.

I want peace, but I also want to fix it. I want rest, but I also want results. I say I trust God, but I catch myself making backup plans in case He doesn’t move fast enough.

Sigh.

But here’s the beautiful thing: even when we struggle to live in that tension — God still stays.
He still whispers hope.
He still invites us back.

Isaiah 30:18 says:

“Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore He will rise up to show you compassion.”

Even when we get it wrong. Even when we’re holding hurt and hope in the same breath. Even when our soul sighs.

So if you’re in that place today — feeling the weight of the “both/and” — you’re not alone. This life isn’t always black and white. But grace meets us in the gray.

Let the sigh come… but don’t stop there. Let it lead you back to the One who gets it all.
The God who’s still gracious.
Still patient.
Still near.